Patient Relationship Management: Got Pigeons?






I was recently in a large call center of one of my clients. Supervisors and CSRs were scurrying about clearing their desks of binders and cheat sheets in an effort to make the center look paperless. I looked up just in time to see an ominous looking flock of people being given the nickel tour. They swept through in a scene reminiscent of the gathering of fowl in Hitchcock’s The Birds. In an instant we knew the flock was from corporate. The suit-people were tethered to their Blackberries and they kept glancing at their watches as though doing so was going to make lunch arrive quicker.

They encircled a cubicle, a few of them preening themselves, leaned forward, pretended to be interested in what they were being shown, nodded appropriately, scribbled down a few notes, and moved on. At one point, a few of them donned headsets to monitor a call. Within thirty minutes, it was all over, just like in the movie.

The next day the memo filtered down from corporate customer care and marketing, outlining all the new procedures the flock deemed necessary based on all the information they’d gleaned during their brief flyover.

Remember, pigeons happen.

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