The mind is a terrible thing. Last night I stumbled across part of the movie Kill Bill Volume 2. There is a character in Volume 2 named Esteban Vihaio, an eighty-something Mexican—for lack of a more erudite word—pimp. His is a small role, but performed beautifully. Uma Thurman, our ninja protagonist, meets Esteban and asks him ‘Where’s Bill?”
With a thick, refined Spanish accent, Esteban repeats the question, drawing out the name “Where is Beeeeeeel?”
Anyway, today I am on the phone. And can you guess the name of the person with whom I am speaking? That’s right, I was talking to Beeeeeeel. He did not have a Spanish accent; nonetheless, I could not stop the voices in my head from trying to translate every phrase so that it sounded like Mr. Esteban. Needless to say, the call went downhill rapidly.
When I think about software implementations the phrase “Help, I’ve failed and I can’t get up” comes to mind.
For many people, the goal of a software implementation is to get to the end, to see the vendor leave. In many minds, that signals that the work is done, and the departure of the vendor signals that the software was implemented correctly. Not true Mon Chéri.
In case you did not get the email, IT has become big business in most corporations, and it takes a group of highly paid bureaucrats to administer it. And you know what happens when you give the bureaucrat a clipboard and ask them to oversee the implementation of a new email system, by the time the dust settles you have spent a few million dollars on a new sales force automation tool—Rube Goldberg on steroids.
Once you start spending it is difficult to stop. And people do not keep spending in the hope of reaping additional ROI; they do so in order to try to salvage a project that in its current state is a white elephant. Most of the cost of an IT project is to get it to do what you thought it would do. This is a classic example of when you are in a hole, stop digging, or at least let me hand you a bigger shovel.